A month and two days.
I've been ready. I'm the girl who has always been so focused, she's spent every summer since she started college taking classes to figure out the path she wanted to take.
Well, now that girl is freaking out.
Is it real life that scares me? The real world? Maybe.
Is it the fact that I'll officially be on my own? Maybe.
Is it that I don't really know what I want to do with my life? Maybe.
Whatever it is, I'm ready for it to go away. I can't handle this anxiety anymore. I've been so lazy the last few days; not wanting to do homework, not wanting to study, not wanting to do anything. There's a part of me that wants to shake the other part and yell, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! You're so close!"
But then the other part wants to yell back, "Are you nuts?! This life is so carefree; so simple! Why in the world would you want to leave?!"
I'm scared.
I'm scared of leaving my family.
I'm scared of having to make decisions.
I'm scared of moving on.
But that's life. And so I need to suck it up and get over it. It's just so hard.
Stay in college while you can, kids. I thought I'd be throwing a party when it was over, but I'd rather get in my pajamas, crawl under the covers and watch a Disney classic.
I think I changed my mind.
I hope I'm ready for this.
