It's hard not to get down and disappointed in a city of millions of people, all of whom have the same dreams, aspirations and desires that you do.
But then, some days, there's a sign--something to remind you what you're doing and why you're doing it. Something reminds you to remain grateful and remember you're blessed for all that you have.
A week ago today, I got a call at 11am from an agency asking me to come in for an interview. I was excited, but it wasn't anything new, really. I had already interviewed with one agency and had another interview scheduled for the following Monday. An agency was only there to find me temporary work--nothing big and nothing that really paid well. Not to mention, most companies that used the temp agencies were companies with really awful turn over rates. Companies that people obviously didn't enjoy working at.
But whatever.
A job's a job, right?
Money is money.
So I went in.
It was an interview for a five-star hotel in Beverly Hills.
Front desk position.
Right up my alley, right?
Turns out, the hotel wanted to interview me right away.
After a twenty minute interview at the agency, they sent me with Google Map directions to this hotel--preparing me for a humongous interview I wished I had more time to think about at the time of arrival. But in the end, sometimes things turn out better when we have less time to think about them, I feel.
I walked in, breathing deeply; afraid of what sat before me.
This place was fancy. It was sophisticated. It was Beverly Hills.
I shuddered but told the girl at the front desk my name and who I was there to see. I sat on a side couch and tried to smooth out my skirt the best that I could.
I had two interviews--one with the general manager, the other with the sales manager.
I felt confident. I felt prepared. I felt knowledgeable as I discussed guest recovery, guest satisfaction and customer service. Ironically, I thank Disney for that one.
The sales manager thanked me and said we'd be in touch, but hurried back before I could leave and said the GM would actually like to offer me the position, on a temporary basis.
Temporary was good enough for me after I heard what they would be paying.
Four days later, they asked me to apply permanently with their company--no longer working with the agency I had barely even worked for. Today, they extended an offer of permanent employment through their hotel group.
I'm happy.
I pushed myself, I believed in myself, and I gave myself a chance. I gave my heart a chance to be happy--to feel accomplished.
I miss my family more than words could even begin to express.
I miss my mom--the greatest friend I know I will ever have; the person that has always believed in my "crazy" no matter how crazy it might just be.
I miss my dad--the role model who inspires me to be a great, hardworking professional who is well respected in this world.
I miss my brother--the one who would play his guitar upstairs in his bedroom and I'd open my door at the bottom of the stairs and turn off my iTunes just to listen to him play.
I miss my brother--the one who I could watch play basketball for hours; the one who would never be too embarrassed to tell me he loved me in front of his peers.
So, yes.
I miss my family, I miss my friends, I miss the familiarity I seemed to get lost in while living in Florida.
But for the first time really ever (which probably sounds sad), I'm proud of myself.
I didn't really wholeheartedly know who I was before I took this journey. I'm still learning bits and pieces day by day--but I'm moving; I'm exploring. LA makes me put myself out there--I have to leave my comfort zone and explore outside of my shell if I want to survive socially.
This feeling? This swelling in my chest every time I step outside and realize I'm living in the city I've only dreamed of living in for so long? That is why I'm here. Somehow I knew I might be happy if I lived here; I knew I might be excited to live my life.
So I took a chance.
I took a risk that could have potentially ended very badly (and I guess, possibly still could).
But it didn't.
I'm so glad I gave myself the chance to be happy. Because in this moment--nothing else matters but this feeling.
xo.
