The boy in the park.

We always have to remind ourselves that there will be good days, and there will be bad. No matter where we are in our lives, we will always have a mixture of both. Of course, we hope for the good; but in the heat of the bad, we have to remind ourselves to breathe.

Yesterday was a day I felt like I was constantly reminding myself to breathe.

I woke up missing LA. This isn't the first day this has happened (and I'm certain it won't be the last), but I just woke up with the aching feeling that it was just going to be a bad day. Thanks to my handy dandy, super smart friends--I tried to avoid that feeling. I tried to shove it to the back of my head and go on with the day in hopes that it would turn around. I just kept replaying in my head why I was in LA in the first place and why I left; though both decisions felt so strongly like they were the right ones, I couldn't grasp the success I had encountered in the city. I felt like I had failed.

So no surprise, my day did not actually turn around.

In the early afternoon, I had errands to run and after I was finished--I was annoyed. I was frustrated with myself that it was now four o'clock and my day still sucked, for lack of a better word. 

So I drove to this park.

I had never been to this park before, but I knew it existed because my brother loved playing basketball there and so I knew the general area it was in and I hoped it would be empty. I just wanted to sit, breathe and think. 

As I'm sitting at a picnic table in the back of the park, I'm so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't realize a boy was walking up to me. I looked up at the last second to see him cautiously approaching; he was probably sixteen years old and he looked just as stressed out as I'm sure I did.

"You're at the park alone?" It was kind of a question but I could tell he was awkwardly trying to make conversation. I have to admit I kind of inwardly groaned. I really, really didn't want to talk to anyone. Especially some teenage kid who I wasn't really sure if he was flirting with me (you are way too young for me, stranger in the park) or just looking for someone to chat with.

"Apparently, so are you," I laughed softly and smiled while realizing that was the first time I had laughed all day.

He sat down and told me he had gotten into an argument with his dad. He told me that he had just found out that he qualified and was potentially being offered a scholarship at UCLA. He told me that he had always had this passion for Southern California and Los Angeles.

I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped. This kid was me. I remember at 17 struggling with the idea of potentially moving to California. As much as I wanted to go during school, I knew it wasn't realistic. I explained to this kid that he should focus on school first, but not to let go of his dream or passion. I told him it was hard work, but if he wanted it badly enough, he could make it work.

He asked me to tell him my story; he wanted to know everything. How I started, what it was like and why I decided to come back.

I told him everything. Sleeping on an air mattress in Koreatown to sharing a one bedroom apartment with my friend, then a two bedroom apartment in the valley all the way to a two bedroom apartment in Beverly Hills/West Hollywood. He was in awe. And honestly? So was I.

I realized in that moment that I didn't fail. I focused on what I wanted, I worked hard and I made it happen. As we separated, he thanked me. He said my advice was honest and real, and he was thankful. Beyond that, I was thankful. I had talked myself through everything that had built up that day and I let it go. I literally felt a sense of peace and relief.

Before we went our different paths, I called out to him, "You're going to be okay." He smiled and nodded before saying, "So are you."

Thank you, boy in the park. I may have helped you, but I think you might have helped me more. Funny how life works out.